This video is about the worst gambling relapse I went through during my 20 year gambling addiction. Hopefully watching it will help you understand that problem gambling is a real thing, and mental health issues are often the cause.
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It was November 2005.
I was so excited.
I won a $20,000 jackpot playing online video poker.
Not only could I pay off the gambling debt I’d been accumulating slowly over the last month or two but I could pay off previous debts as well.
I could put this nightmare behind me.
And then almost in the same moment I realized there was no way I was going to keep that money.
I was a gambling addict.
I wasn’t going to stop just because I won a big amount.
Stopping would mean that I wasn’t gambling anymore.
If I wasn’t gambling anymore I would have to deal with life, and the whole reason I gambled in the first place was because I couldn’t deal with life.
I had Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) but at the time I had no idea.
Everything was so hard for me.
A regular work day.
Having friends.
Being in a relationship with anyone…
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